Why ratings are stupid and irresponsible

What started as a silly and frivolous conversation with my boyfriend has turned into an issue I just can't bury, that's right people I let my boyfriend 'rate' me objectively, out of ten, and he didn't give me ten. Shock, horror. He loves me, but he thinks I'm a... deep breath.... eight. A mother fucking eight. That is two whole points that I could improve on. It is genuinely plaguing me, like ... well... the plague ( I am sorry I am not particularly figurative today). 

Baaaaaaaaasically he came out with the whole 'hey if you were going to rate me objectively what would I be?' and I being the sensible girlfriend creature I am went, well I can't be objective because I love you kitten. Blurgh. Stupid me, because when I ask him without even a second of pause for thought he goes 'eight'. Straight off the bat. To make me 'feel better' he does say that Scarlett Johansson is a nine, thanks a bundle, that really improved my mood. hahahhahahah... sorry.

Don't get me wrong. I think the whole idea of rating anyone based on looks is so stupid that it barely merits an iota of thought, this was literally one of those throw-away conversations. From anyone else an eight probably would have pleased me, as pathetic as that is to admit. But for some reason I am just going over and over and over working out what has marked me down those two points.

I've compiled a list - 

• Un-plucked eyebrows
• Bad skin
• Fat hips
• Man arms

Each of these he has denied valiantly and continually reminded me it was a joke, and that he thinks he's a six so he is technically batting above his weight. BUT NONE OF THAT MATTERS, because if you love me I should be a ten. I should have a little halo of excellence and you should think that I am way hotter than Scarlett Johansson because I actually want to do it with you, in real life, you lowly six (except you're not because I love you and to me you are evidently a ten, idot). 

So there. All I can leave you with is NEVER, EVER RATE YOUR BOYFRIEND/GIRLFRIEND. It cannot end well. Unless they give you a ten....

Daphne and a small input from Dorothy

Hey, You Shouldn't Rate People on The Internet!

 
My reaction....


So recently something horrifying happened, someone (lets call him 'N') attempted to 'tag' a large number of girls in a 'Rate Status' and then proceed, uninvited to 'rate' them, out of ten. And then, some of the GIRLS STARTED 'LIKING' THE PROCESS. Why would you support such a shallow and potentially damaging thing? WHAT HAPPENED TO SISTERHOOD?!

The main reason was that we are all taught to accept this kind of behavior, on a day to day basis, is that that this snidey, yet supposedly 'jokey' actions is referred to as Banter. which is basically an excuse to say anything. Two people are obviously flirting, well apparently it's only 'Banter', someone calls you fat/ugly, relax man, its only 'Banter'. and no-one wants to call the 'Banterers' (pretty sure that's not a word) in on this because to do so would seem like you were an uptight dickhead. In some cases the word 'banter' seems to excuse a lot. Sometimes you have to admit that some people are sensitive, and what you are saying, although in your head may be in jest, could really hurt other people. When I was younger, and I said something mean to my sister, and my excuse was 'I was only joking,' my mum would point out that it made no one laugh. And in my head, I knew the the joke excuse was a veiled lie anyway, I was saying those things too be mean. That is what is happening here, if the butt of the joke is not enjoying it, then it ISN'T A JOKE.

In this instance, I just don't think the excuse of 'banter' can be used. By judging and rating people in such a way you are implying that you have some kind of right to judge their body and that they should care what you think of them, as if your supposed elevated position means you own their body and their self esteem. It's simply an objectifying exercise. If you have invited such judging  and opted to have it pasted all over the internet, fair enough. Otherwise, people do not have the right to judge a person they barely know out of 10 on the internet.

Plus it's just plain rude.

Sorry for the ranting.

Dorothy

Might I add that this was posted because it happened TO ME and I was actually too upset to even blog about it, fact of the matter was none of the unwanted ratings were removed or apologised for and they seemed to just be stating a general male consensus that was previously 'a secret'. 

Daphne