Wednesday 20 November 2013

My current procrastination

As it appears I've gone to uni to get a first in procrastination, I thought I would share my new favourite - I have rekindled my love for Sex and The City. Carrie Bradshaw is my dream woman, Miranda's witty biting comments, Samantha Jones just utterly totally and Charlotte's adorableness have been making the cold Scottish days a little bit warmer. 

The clothes, the men and the city. How could I forget how much I loved this show? 

1.It has things that reflect my new found uni life - 




2. It has good advice - 



3. Their problems are our problems, or your friend's problems, basically life problems - 




4. Those women (and Stanford) have got friendship down - 





5.These... just... yeah... Carrie... sigh



6. Let's not forget the real star of the show, the fashion - 


even if it was 'out there' at times...


I think it will always have a place in my heart even when I'm not an angsty teenage girl... sigh. 





Tuesday 19 November 2013

So Exicited For the Meadham Kirchoff and Topshop Collab

I love a highstreet collaboration , I think I have an item from about four different collabs (Christopher Kane, Versace, Kate Moss and JW Anderson, although I did my them all on ebay... no shame)

Meadham Kirchhoff for Topshop

But I really really love Meadham Kirchoff. So I might pay full price for this. and if it goes how the Mary Katranzou collaboration went, where the ebay prices where actually the same/more expensive, this may be an investment anyway.

Meadham Kirchhoff : Furry handbag
Meadham Kirchhoff : Black dress with eyesMeadham Kirchhoff : Rainbow t-shirt
Meadham Kirchhoff : Pink snake scarf
Meadham Kirchhoff : cherry blouse


Sunday 10 November 2013

The Correct Use Of The Phrase 'Oh Snap'

Test To See How 'Northern' You Are.



Awwwh, the North/South Divide of Britain is something, cherished and cultivated for generations, passed on from prejudiced and proud families generation to generation. Fanned by the flames of the Daily Mail and Margaret Thatcher, it is a very real part of British Culture. I am from the north, and all though I am currently residing in Rome, Italy, the rolling hills of Yorkshire still are deeply in my heart. I've gone further north to the wilds of Scotland and resent when Scottish people refer to me as from 'down south'. No.  I miss chips and gravy, even though the gelatos are IMMENSELY DELICIOUS. Still haven't tried a deep fried Mars bar... The joy I felt when I met someone in Rome from Wakefield (a place near my hometown) was like realising that in Aladdin the "Beast" from Beauty and the Beast and Pinocchio are among the toys in the Sultan's toy chest and in the scene where Aladdin asks the genie to make him a prince, the genie pulls Sebastian, the crab from The Little Mermaid, out of a cookbook. Anyway, I diverge. 

So I was feeling nostalgic due to this article where Yorkshire  has been named the third best holiday destination in the world. Yeah! Of course it is, we have Brontë territory for cripes sake, the moors ! 

Anyway, if you want to test your own 'Northerness' as I did, apparently I'm 60%, and from near Doncaster which isn't far off, follow this link http://toys.usvsth3m.com/north-o-meter/ I think I went a bit too far, got a good old 90 %.... Scotland may have changed me.

Yorkshire also invented Twerking.
Yorkshire folk go t'work five days a week.

B'dum dum tch...



Monday 4 November 2013

Man Who Threw His Hands Up Too Early For A Drop Is Set To Sue Nightclub For ‘Emotional Distress’

Hahahhaa, this made me laugh. Pretty sure it is a joke though unfortunately.
A clubber who was left “embarrassed and ostracized” when he threw his hands up too early during an extended trance drop has decided to sue the club for emotional distress. Johnathan Entwhistle is taking legal action against the nightclub, which cannot be named for legal reasons.
Mr. Entwhistle has said in his statement, “It’s taken humanity centuries to formulate the four bar phrase, it’s tradition. But then this maverick comes along and starts dropping fifth bars like they were coming into fashion. I threw my arms up four beats before the kick in and shouted my approval as is standard but I was alone in this action and it has caused much hurt and distress to me and those around me.”
“I’m now afraid to express approval about anything for fear of jumping the gun again and looking like some amateurish clown,” continued Mr. Entwhistle. “Clapping, nodding appreciatively and congratulating people are now off limits. I tried to congratulate my wife on a blowjob well done last week, but I spoke too early and orgasmed just as she was pulling her face away. She’s now blind in one eye.”
Fellow clubbers reported on the initial premature fist pump claiming, “We were so embarrassed for him. He looked so smug and “in the know” when he fist pumped. But when the beat didn’t kick in he just looked like a bemused, out of place, fool,” recounted one clubber. “He’s a good looking guy but after seeing that I find the notion of sex with him laughably unlikely, and I have very low standards.”
The club itself was also quick to respond saying “We stand by our music policy. The DJ in question has been here for years and this is the first time something like this has ever happened. We blame the increase in looping technology.”
Mr Entwhislte’s lawyers responded by saying, “We’ll take this all the way to Native Instruments if we have to. You can’t just go against years of tradition and expect to get away with it. This isn’t just some tradition you can throw away as useless like Catholicism, or monogamy.”
The DJ himself stated, “The plan was to build that extra bit of tension, to whip the crowd into a frenzy, whereby they couldn’t wait for the beat to kick back in. Obviously, it worked.”
Mr. Entwhistle has sent a request to the High Court asking for the trial to be overseen by Judge Jules, “because he is the only person who straddles the worlds of law and EDM.”
However, when the High Court responded by saying that due to his lack of legal knowledge, they could not admit Judge Jules to the bar, Mr. Entwhistle took offence at the usage of the word ‘bar’ and is now suing the High Court for further emotional distress.

Source Wunderground 

Celebrating Marlon Brando. The Man. The Legend, The Upper Arms

Marlon Brando was the perfect specimen, it's just that moment in Streetcar, every single time...
Reaction GIF: eye roll, flirting, Marlon Brando

Look at his humor (GSOH) actually he is being a dick here in the film (Stanley is always a dick) ... not funny, but that doesn't take away from the arms.


And the way he wears his clothes, the way he takes them off....


And his face


And back to his face


His musical talents

And the recorder.

His arms.... always the arms.
And those perfect arms.

And back to his GSOH


And he lets cats drape on him
And this one

I wanna be the cat... don't we all?

He's a motivated worker.
Marlon Brando Was A Perfect Man


AND THIS
And finally, this:

Take me. We'd have to share...

The MAXXI Gallery, Spinning Vaginas, Over Rated Biro and Blood Doodles, and Francesco Vezzoli




So I recently went to the MAXXI 21st Century Art Museum I  Rome, unfortunately contemporary art doesn't always float my boat, the main example being 'Happy Moms', by Daniele Puppi, which I think is just ridiculous, crude, and unimaginative (and unnecessary). I'll add a video when I can, I'm having technical difficulties at the moment, but if you want to see some spinning vagina's and ass holes, feel free and youtube it, just not up my street.  I also wasn't that impressed by Jan Fabre either, his exhibition was called 'StigMata' yet it seems very self inflicted, and he just seems to be provocative for provocativeness's sake, and lacking any actual skill. He spend a few days locked in a Dutch gallery doodling on himself and surfaces, in biro pen and called it 'bic-art', and they were shite doodles anyway. Maybe he's done loads of other really great art, but at this particular exhibition, I didn't see it. Ahaha don't hold back mate!
Reaction GIF: eye roll, Lena Headey, Game of Thrones


During his 'money-performances' he burned money and wrote the word 'MONEY' with the ashes. In 1977 he renames the street where he lives to "Jan Fabre street" and fixes a commemorative plaque "Here lives and works Jan Fabre" to the house of his parents, by analogy to the commemorative plate on the house of Vincent Van Gogh in the same street. In 1978 he makes drawings with his own blood during the solo performance 'My body, my blood, my landscape'. In 1980 'The Bic-Art Room' he had himself locked up for three days and three nights in a white cube full of objects, drawing with blue Bic ballpoint pens as an alternative to Big art Established in 1986. Plus there was this long video of him sand papering his legs, whilst in a pinstripe suit. Anonymous doesn't like him either...




Fortunately, I did find one artist that I really did like, and that was Francesco Vezzoli.

This is a series of 'self portraits' that he did, where he took iconic statues  or busts, and the did a mirror of himself, I loved the use of mixed media, and the humour  I also think that it's nod to the past and use of actual skill is refreshing also. I'm a big fan of Raphael's comics, and my fave artist is Klimt, so I'm more into art where your like 'wow, this persons skilled'  as opposed to 'this is saying something (supposedly) about modern society', and it's proper depressing . You don't have to do it in blood for it to be 'edgy'.. looking at you Jan
He also does a lot of embroidery  having discovered the lost art as a student at Central Saint Martins, he uses a lot of golden age Hollywood film stars (Liz Taylor)
Loving the embroidered tears

I also enjoyed his use of classic religious imagery.



This is another self portrait, however, here he is changing sexes.
Just as Marcel Duchamp created Belle Haleine: Eau de Voilette in 1921 using a Rigaud perfume bottle with an altered label, Francesco Vezzoli has created a signature perfume for the contemporary moment. Greed's label features Vezzoli in drag, photographed by Francesco Scavullo, where Duchamp appeared on his perfume bottle as Rrose Sélavy, photographed by Man Ray. The bottle of perfume is accompanied by a 60-second commercial for the perfume -- directed by Roman Polanski and starring Natalie Portman and Michelle Williams -- as well as a new series of needlework portraits of leading female figures in art history – including Tamara de Lempicka, Eva Hesse, Leonor Fini – as immortalized endorsements of Vezzoli's fragrance. Below is said advert.




More statue mimic self portraits