Tuesday 26 February 2013

Serial Killer Groupies, Why Do Girls Like Bad Boys

I Love getting Mail from
I've never heard a boy say that he wanted his girl friend to be more of a bitch, sometime they exclaim 'she's a bitch but she's hot', to many males and females, having an obviously nasty personality is not attractive at all. So how come I see lovely, attractive girls staying with boys that treat them like absolute shite? Chris Brown, Rhianna anyone? I'm not going to get into a 'nice guys finish last' argument because I think that is flawed also, perhaps the reason that they don't want to jump your bones has nothing to do with your 'niceness' but more to do with other factors. Having been treated like shit by many a guy and gone back for more I can completely say with one hundred percent certainty I have no real idea why I let them treat me like that. I'm interested to see what you make of it!

So why is it that people (and girls in particular) seem to gravitate towards 'bad boys' aka, utter twatfaces. Apparently, even mass murderers receive countless amounts of fan mail, and even MARRIAGE PROPOSALS! WTF YOU MENTALS. These are the only reasons that I can think of.

1. A Sense Of Danger.
Young girls, and sometimes even older ones, the Fifty Shades effect ick ick ick, can really enjoy Vampire romance novels, you know, the once where the male lead is moody and really wants to kill them and suck their blood like a chocolate milkshake. Yet at the same time they find the fanged pale males really attractive, perhaps this is because they're confusing their fear for them for attraction? I guess it'll never be boring. I genuinely think The Fifty Shades series is the perfect translation from desperate for love tweens to bored housewives. It is a sense of this is so wrong, but maybe I don't want to be right. But actually in real life it is no where near as exciting, and they never declare undying love, they are treating you like a dickhead because nine times out of ten they are (see the film He's Just Not That Into You, clears so much up). 

2. Attention.
If you marry a serial killer, you're going to get attention. Perhaps these women enjoy the fact that everyone in their neighborhood knows their name, and that people actually care, Münchausen syndrome, is a mental illness whereby someone lies for attention, or deliberately makes their children ill, or lies about illness for sympathy and attention, often especially wanting the attention of the 'officials' such as the ambulances and hospitals. Perhaps this is an extention of that? The constant drama that comes with a 'bad boy/murdering raping scumbag' may appeal to some. The fact that the guy has the balls to actually go through with it can also be a little primal? Survival of the fittest maybe, willing to do what others won't. Some people are scary...

3. I Want To Save Them
Women are fixers. We like to think we can make something better. In fact many of these women who have 'reached out' to these inhumane individuals have done so apparently with the sincere desire to save their souls,  'Several were heavily involved in anti-death penalty campaigns before they met their significant others.  Some were moved by Christian conviction to contact – and save – these doomed souls, only to discover that they ultimately were the ones who needed saving.  (I am reminded of a story in Jacquelynne Wilcox-Bailey’s book about two middle-aged Christian sisters from Australia who left stable marriages to marry recently released violent offenders with whom they had romanced in prison.  One was bludgeoned to death with a hammer and the other one narrowly escaped death after her new hubby tried to cut off her ear and pull out her teeth with pliers). This is so true, every girl with a bad boy/player wants to be 'the one' that tamed him. She wants to be the one that made him want to be a better person, because it makes her special and he thinks she is caring (most likely has deep rooted maternal issues and will just use her as a caregiver in later life whilst he sips Stella on the couch watching the Corrie omnibus) and likes that she cares for him. 

4. They Most Probably Won't Cheat On Me
Many of the most popular (well get the most fan mail) are the one's with a life sentence, perhaps this is because the woman knows that the man will have all the time in the world to focus all their attention on them, and they will be the only person that that attention will be focused on. They probably like the feeling of being someone's one and only lifeline into the outside world, she is literally his world and where on Earth are you going to get something that intense (why you would want it is still beyond me). But it does sound like these guys are spoilt for choice, how would you know you aren't just another clinger on to his rockstarmurderer status? Vomit. 

Conclusion.

Many people think women who fall for serial killers must either be a) lonely, unattractive, and unable to find love in the “real world” or b) mentally unstable women who have some kind of strange fixation.  The reality is much more complicated.
First of all, these women come from all sectors of society. Some of them are beautiful; others are not.  Some of them are highly educated; others are not. Women’s fascination with men behind bars is a lot more complex than would seem on the surface.  But whether the drive is danger-by-association or misguided compassion, the serial killer groupie often bites off more than she can chew.  And while some serial killer groupies go through a series of death-row inmates looking for that perfect partner, more than one has been bewildered by the discovery that what started as a mission wound up a match. Such as Veronica Lynn Compton, for example, wrote Ken Bianchi a letter asking his advice about a female serial killer character in one of her screenplays, and Rosalie Martinez, a mitigation specialist left her successful attorney-husband and comfortable lifestyle to marry Oscar Ray Bolin, a low life convicted of raping and murdering three young women.  And Christine Kizuka married serial killer Angelo Buono (one-half of the Hillside Strangler duo) after meeting him while visiting her then-husband in Folsom State Prison. That almost makes it seem as if it is 'love' that they weren't meant to be together and it happened purely by chance but they were drawn like moths to a very dangerous and highly burny flame. I find this truly odd, but I guess the day in day out life style of an everyday person can be unsatisfactory and something that makes it abnormal can make it interesting too? 

I don't really know the full reasons, personally, I've never wanted someone who has the capacity to hurt me, but I guess I have had crushes on dark t.v character  perhaps this is why women go for these kinds when their in prison, perhaps they like that fact that they can distance themselves, the inmate doesn't actually seem like a real person. They never have to interact with their family and loved ones, so to them they are just a fictional character. They don't pose any real threat when they are on death row or on a life sentence, that person is almost like an imaginary lover, so they can be made into anything the woman wants. Like on the t.v, they can stop contact at any point. That doesn't explain real life though. However, we must also realize that many of these people are manipulative, it is entirely possible that these women are too pressured and hypnotized by these people to see their true nature. Or they don't want to see their true nature because they get such a kick out of how 'taboo' the relationship is. 

Awesome, LaToya's Peddling the Jackson Kids for Cash

Dorothy and Daphne


Giles- I'm Loving (Grungy) Angles Instead.

A journey from the good to the dark side of the heavens
I'm going to see if i can make a dress like this, it'll be my summer project, I've got a load of gold sheets that I can paint on.

Natural Change or Self Exile? Some Concerns I Have - Daphne




Being part of a tight knit girl group is never easy, it has its own social politics, hierarchy and idiosyncrasies. Last year both Dorothy and I went on the 'group holiday' and it was an excellent time, there were some admittedly low points but we look back on them with mostly humour now. This summer (as I have previously mentioned) I intend on travelling a little sometimes with friends, meeting up with old friends and sometimes alone. This doesn't concern me in the slightest but it means that I have already made my plans and can't really gallivant off on a girls' holiday as well. Who has that kind of cash? Mate, we don't have to pay for the apartment, just the flights, if we had to go full out, I would be in the same boat.? Want to spend the whole summer away so can't afford flights from where I'm going to be to Tenerife then back, or vice versa ...

I've been feeling a bit distanced from my group for a while after various incidents, and really have my own circles of friends out side of this group so it hasn't been the worst thing in the world. Sometimes I do think it is just natural change and that we are growing apart, or that we all have different priorities. I have been going out for a while now and for them it is still relatively new and seems to be way more of a make or break kind of thing, whereas I'm at a more take the nights as they come kind of point. Anyway, the fact of the matter is, I am the only girl not going on 'THE HOLIDAY' and if what I remember from last year is correct it is going to be unbearable to spend any time at all with 'the group' from now until June. Basically if I don't want to listen to them plan constantly I am just going to have to live a life of isolation and loneliness.  This is out of choice I might add. It may sound like I am cutting off my nose to spite my face and in many ways I probably am, but quite often I feel like they don't want or need me around and I am closer to other people that I don't need to constantly look to for validation/feel comfortable being my total self around.

I disagree, sure, it might be painful that your're not going on the holiday, however, last year other members of the group didn't go on the holiday, and they didn't feel the need to distance themselves. We've only just started planning it, of course it's going to be talked about, it's inevitable. And it annoyed the shit out of them?! What is the point anyway when I didn't feel happy, comfortable or totally included before, I think this has just helped me realise that. 
Cutting off nose to spite my face, or self preservation?

So here is my problem, I don't want to exile myself for no good reason and then wonder why Dorothy is my only remaining friend at my college. But college is coming to an end and I already have a pretty clear idea on who will still be in my life when we all go our separate ways, the group is already greatly reduced. Which makes me wonder if this is just the beginning of that natural change process, all I am doing is accelerating the inevitable right?

Don't you feel that your cutting off your nose to spite your face? What will you achieve? I totally agree but it does just feel like there is nothing left for me in our group and frankly I don't think they are bothered either way so aren't I just saving everyone a job and an awkward conversation? You're surrounded by great people, it would be a waste of time to isolate yourself, to stop 'akwardness'. I really think you should give this decision time, I'm sure when the first flush of excitement calms down it will all be more manageable to be around.

Daphne and Dorothy

Pretty Sweet ... honey, that is!

I discovered this when I was reading a particularly guilty pleasure of mine, Glamour magazine and it was two presenters discussing their experience with Oxfam GB's Plan Bee scheme. Giving women in Ethiopia the necessary know how and equipment to manage Bee Hives. It is giving the power to these women and bringing them together beautifully and I think it is a lovely thing to be involved in. So I am (pardon the pun) trying to create a buzz!



http://www.oxfam.org.uk/donate/content/plan-bee/about-the-project

Daphne 

I love HBO's Girls. But I wanted more from the latest episode



I am a huge Girls fan and felt the need to do another Girls post, this time about the completely bizarro and underwhelming latest episode. Okay, so I do love the Jessa - Hannah friendship growing and changing and it is interesting to see some of Jessa's background, but I am getting a bit sick of the lack of movement. I want some follow up on the story lines yet this is the second time this series where I feel like an episode has just been a bit static and out of context.

I guess it made a valid point about life and family relationships affecting our own relationships and all of that sort of stuff. But something about it just didn't sit right with me.

Don't get me wrong Lena Dunham is doing her job excellently, I just think that the series are too short as they are and therefore can't afford to let the plot stall for the sake of a bit of a romp at someone's parents house/with a guy who's bins Hannah used a few times. There were some truly hilarious moments (Hannah's reaction to eating the rabbit and being told it is all they eat was brilliant) but all I want is MORE. I miss Shosh and Marnie and the whole gang being together, Hell I even miss Adam and Marnie's wimpy ex. I want to see more weird outfits, stupid parties and Marnie and Hannah fixing some shit. 

Side-bar- Jessa's wardrobe is as beautiful as ever. The stylist on this program is superb (the dorky teen wearing the 'turtle neck' was hilarious in its own right)! 



Daphne

Sorry we are such useless bloggers!




Dorothy and I are going to do a Nick Clegg and make an eensy weensy apology for being absent(ish) for about a week now. Promise there is lots more bloggy goodness on the way, we are just letting our lives get in the way of more important things, ie. this! So just hold tight .... 

Yeah, we're shit, but we'll make it up to you, promise, and that  wasn't  a LibDem Promise, That was a Fillies Promise. It's even stronger than a brownie promise.

Daphne and Dorothy

Tuesday 19 February 2013

Tom Ford is Back, It's The Love Child of Roy Lichtenstein and An Eskimo



This is Tome Fords first Runway Show since 2004, so he really had to make an impression now that he's changed his mind about the evils of the runway.  So there was not of sequins and native/ethnic patters, ponchos and art deco style prints, with a good measure of pop art thrown in. And no 'minimalism' in sight, hurrah.
"I got tired of minimalism, I'm not in the mood for it - so there was lots of colour, I'm really in the mood for colour so that at times it was almost garish," said Ford.  
This Bomber jacket is amazing, it's just at the fabulous/gaudy line

KerPow.
Fringed Poncho
Just Look At Those Boots

The Boots, The Skirt,need say more.  I think I love those boots. I think I actually love them.
Pop Art influence

I Need these Boots. You get the yellow. I get the blue. BOOM  = EXCELLENCY
This is what a stylish Eskimo would wear
I like blue fur. Something about blue fur is really nice.
This is really cool

Topshop Unique AW 2013, Is Embracing the Nineties.



So opening the show on the track list was Blur with 'Girls and Boys' you know that tune 'girls are boys who like boys to be girls' ect. So I thought you could play the tune while reading my views on the collections highlights/lowlights.

There's a lot of PVC, but it's a lot better than their SS 2013,- where They Went For 'Doctor Chic' But Just Hit 'Care Home Confusion'

What I love about this is not that difficult for you to create yourself, no offense, but you could easily find similar items on ebay, which is great
I would love a red plasticy skirt, I also really like the red snake print cowboy boots too.
I pretty much own those boots. You know my cowboy boots! We can make this.
Bit Paddinton Bear esque
I think this is a onesie....... I'm a fan of an all in one. Why are you so against them?
Again, you could source this get up from ebay. Like the cut of the pants. 
I enjoy the combination of those boots with this dress, really nice.  Very you!
 
Midi Length Skirts seem to be a thing Topshop is pushing at the moment. They don't flatter everyone, but Ido like the volume here as opposed to those 'you aren't allowed to walk midis'. 
This jacket started out promising, but those sleeves have completely sabotaged  any  public wearablity. I would I think it is cool.
THIS IS MY 2ND FAVE. Part grunge, part fairy (it's kind of what I go for day to day). You are such a grunge fairy! Love that
OK, this is defiantly a onesie. Personally, I've never succumbed to the onesie ,  Yes I understand tat some people are fans but can be please keep them of the runways, and also can people stop  going out in public, you just look like giant babies. I LIKE AN ALL IN ONE. THEY ARE FUN. 
Pastel Russian. The thigh high split, daring.
Quite Great Gatsby. Again with the split skirt. Quite sexy and sophisticated.
THIS WAS MY  FAVORITE. It's just perfect. Soooo you! Its just you, you would look better in it than the model! I just see it. 

I'm in love with this jumpsuit. Unfortunately I'm not lean or leggy enough to carry it off.  NOW YOU ARE TALKING. I want this! I can see myself in this!